why?

it's sooo fucking frustrating! how do you stay a good person and still go along with what's other people do for the sake of harmony. no one talks about it. they just do it. why? isn't there another way? why hasn't anyone solve the problem? why keep going? hasn't she been tourtured enough! i haven't felt this way in a long time and i don't see a way out. i'm hurt, frustrated, angry and sad for them. if only they can say "don't touch me!". your advocator is coming.

i love surprises

i recently noticed i love getting surprised. i love the feeling knowing that someone went out of their way to make my day. sometimes that someone doesn't even have to try. i was told i pretty on my birthday and i knew it was true statement, especially coming from this guy! it made me feel good about myself. two days ago i walked off my job. i decided to come back and everyone was telling me that one of the troublemakers (who happens to be one of my favs) was upset and stop eating because he thought i wasn't coming back! i was so touched! i just wanted to give him kisses and hugssssssss!!!! i love those surprises!!

lust

he's so unbelievably hot... so sexy. i've never used that word the way i do to describe him. just looking at him is like "whoooa". his eyes say so much and they're beautiful.....so dark and light. i love his face. the way his jet black hair compliments the scruffiness of this jaw line. just want to bite his lips!! i just want to be held by him. his warm body next to mine and his long arms around me..... he's so SEXY!!! i've never been attracted to the "dark, tall and handsome", but this guy is more than that. he's a real MAN. his voice, personality, sexual appeal, everything! it's soo sexy.